July 4th

Happy Independence Day!!!

Or, as Ginger says, Happy Precedent Day!

Either way, this was July 4th weekend. The 4th of July is another holiday that I do NOT do well. I do not like sudden, loud noises. Never have, never will. And, other than fireworks, what is there to DO on July 4th? Have a cookout? We have cookouts every day. That hardly seems special.

Honestly, I'm stumped on this one. When my kids grow up, they are going to tell their therapists that their mother never did anything fun on the holidays. It makes me kinda sad.

The one thing that I DO manage to do for the 4th is to purchase a variety of flammable items. As with everything else in our silly little life, I have rules about these flammable items. First rule is that no item can cost more than $2. Second rule is that no one can touch these items. Third rule is that there can be NO CRYING. (The "no crying" rule is very important. Trust me).

Anyway, the kids have unionized overnight and I could no longer enforce rule #2. However, I have instilled sufficient fear in 3 out of 4 children to ensure some level of safety.

Maddie spent the night yelling at Owen "Point that thing away from me!!!" and "Turn the other way!" and "Watch out!" and "That's a fire hazard!!!"

CoCo cowered in a chair, making those irritating, squeaky puppy noises that she makes.

Ginger wouldn't even come outside! I'm becoming more and more convinced that she is the smartest one in the bunch.

Even the giant Buddha dog was scared. He somehow managed to get his huge, arthritic butt onto the sofa. He squeezed his body so far down into the cushions that he couldn't get back out by himself. I had practically had to lift him off the sofa to get him down (after which, he thanked me in a rather stinky way).

In the end, I'm not sure if we had fun or not. Owen was the only child injured (and, it really doesn't count if it doesn't require medical attention, right?). No one cried. I guess that is enough to declare the evening a success.


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